What Does God Want Me To Do?
By Cathy, California
My partner and I have lived together like a married couple for thirty years, but gay marriage was not legal yet. We belonged to a country club, where I played tennis regularly. Many of the members and tennis staff knew us and were very congenial and welcoming, but the main administration did not.
I unwittingly did something that brought our situation to light. Within a week we were sent a letter informing us that I was not welcome there as a member. All the tennis members that I knew were very upset and wrote letters to the administration in support of us, and even made arrangements to play once a week elsewhere so I could still play with them. I had a lot of loving relationships there and it was very beautiful, and really warmed my heart, but it made no difference to the club.
The club leases the land upon which it sits from the city and is supposed to abide by the city’s policy of no discrimination, but would not. Many people encouraged me to file a law suit. My life partner did not want to fight them.
I felt so unsure of what to do, and unclear about the spiritual meaning of what was happening. So I did a spiritual exercise. I met with Wah Z in a garden on the inner planes. I asked, “Mahanta, what should I do, fight this situation or walk away? What does God want me to do?” The answer was “God does not care what you do. You have total freedom to choose. What is important is that no matter which path you choose, that you not be attached to the result, and that you remember to act with love.”
I was astounded and thrilled with this answer. I could proceed without guilt on either path, which was like a weight being lifted from my shoulders. And I felt that it would be easy for me to trust in God about the result, and send these people behind the issue divine love. They were learning about divine love in this lifetime just like I am learning. I set about to sending them love every time I thought of it, and certainly whenever the topic came up. I decided not to think any more about fighting the issue because that would bring the most harmony in my home.
Within several months all was resolved. The club, perhaps fearing a lawsuit, brokered a deal with us to transfer the membership into my name, and bent some of their other rules which allowed both of us to use the club the way we always had, and waived the associated fees. Within a few months after that, someone else brought suit against the city for not forcing the club to follow its antidiscrimination policy, and the club was forced to change its policy for everyone, always.
The ECK does not care so much about what you do, but the way you do it, which is always to do things with divine love. I thought this was an amazing outcome, and I felt truly blessed to have had this wonderful inner guidance.