By

How to Let Go without Feeling Guilty

difficult people, Harold Klemp, patience, sin and guilt, spiritual insightBy Harold Klemp

Q: Can you give a spiritual insight on: How to expand into a more patient, more loving being? How to let go of attitudes or people that are hurting me spiritually? How to let go of them without having feelings of sin or guilt?

A: Yours is an excellent question. It bothers others too. The key is “without having feelings of sin and guilt,” because that phrase puts the concern into down-to-earth living.

Notice how changes in nature are most often over eons of time. The heat and cold of desert mountains set rocks to tumble—one here, another there. Eons pass. But the ages see those mountains turn into gentle, rolling hills.

Less often does nature change earth’s landscape by explosion or upheaval. Such rapid change leaves scars upon the land that resist healing.

When possible, let those people go without slamming the door. The exception, of course, is in cases where those people’s attitudes are a serious threat to your spiritual well-being. That may require a firm “no more of that—good-bye.”

Otherwise, the less harmful associations can be let to dry up and wither away.

Be unavailable to such people. Ignore their messages and invitations. Don’t give ear to their rumblings or complaints. Maybe they’ll get the hint.

With those who linger, be firm but kind.

Excerpted from A Modern Prophet Answers Your Key Questions about Life, Book 2.

 

29 Responses to How to Let Go without Feeling Guilty

  1. Jamie says:

    Some time ago one of my relatives and acquaintance started getting into my zone. They didn’t let me be me & started questioning things that I did. In short,they lacked in compassion. I felt terrible when this happened. I feared even at the idea of having to go through the pain of it again. That is when I saw this message from this blog. I felt truly relieved because I can now be unavailable to them and the acquaintance still lingers around me so I am being firm but kind. It’s great that I understood what Z was saying very clearly. Life indeed teaches much better than any book.

  2. Marian Adams says:

    I had a very negative relationship throughout my life with my Mother. In the past few years she has needed more and more help from me. It was extremely difficult at times because she was verbally / mentally / emotionally abusive. I knew that she was teaching me to have more self respect for myself. By studying my conditioning and patterns of behaviour I have been able to transcend these patterns and now respond instead of react when my buttons are pressed. I am grateful to the Mahanta for enabling me to transcend this situation and find a level of peace myself and my Mother can share.
    M.A.

  3. deanna strahl says:

    leaving it alone, focusing and doing the discourses along with 1 half an hour of contemplations works for me!

  4. Eulalie Anokoi says:

    I was feeling guilty of taking distances, but now I understand that I did it for my own spiritual survival. It’s sometimes so hard to show some love while there no confidence out of their behavior.

    I’ve been given the impression of making them great victims, but at the same time they may reject my whole being when it comes to show them some loving attitude.

    Now I know that I just have to let go and put all of it in the ECK.

    Thank you Wah Z.

  5. RICHARD OKAGBARE says:

    I do experience these feelings of sin and guilt. At times I rationalise unpleasant experiences as karma. Last year I wrote a message asking for forgiveness to several people, especially women, who I felt my attitude have hurt in the course of my encounters with them. Sometimes when I get hurt, I recall the Master’s words: that your wish to be at peace with the world does not mean the world wants to be at peace with you. No doubt, letting go doesn’t come easy and quick but I am learning, growing and maturing with each new day. The Master’s message is for me is reassuring and a confirmation of the correctness of letting go, person and action, that brought tears to your eyes.
    Thank you Mahanta.

  6. Godfirst Ubochi says:

    Eckankar Is A Pure Pathway To God. Ever since I encountered this religion, My Life Is Changed For Better.

  7. Pam Terrell says:

    Thank you for this simple loving approach to honoring our own well-being!

  8. Ugochukwu Madu says:

    I am indeed grateful for this sincere advise from the Mahanta, the Living Eck Master. My colleagues in the work place cheat, discriminate and hurt me at will without any regards to my feelings – I always sing HU for direction on what to do next. However, I am greatly consoled with the advise from the Master.

  9. Rachel says:

    Thank you Wah Z for helping me to keep away from family members that hurts me each time they get in contact with me. I have tried to avoid them and also let them be. May the blessings be.

  10. Nwabuikwu Kanu-Mgbemena. says:

    Thank you, Wah Z, for this message. I’d been hurt by people I literally nurtured, since I embraced Eckankar, late in 1990. But I’m unable to walk away from them, because, as I then thought, they’re family, and past karma had brought them around me this time.

    But your present message has simply set me free, so long I’m acting with love and tolerance towards them, and particularly with my feeling that I’d done more than my very best for each; without expecting even a “thank you” from any of them.

    Just back from my Satsang Class on Lesson 6, of “The Soul Travel 1” Discourses, to receive this Spiritually Insightful message from The Mahanta, the Living ECK Master, has indeed reassured me of the “Connecting Diamonds” feature of the Master’s feature in the Eckankar programme.. Again, I am GRATEFUL, Z.

  11. Gail says:

    I would love more questions and answers in the newsletter. I find it extremely helpful. It’s the first thing I read when I get my newsletter. Thank you!

  12. virginia says:

    Exactly the message I needed right now. Thank you.

  13. Peter Akpokodje says:

    A very useful blog. It reminds me of an experience I had and still going though once in a while. It also reminds me of the Master’s message of giving others beingness.

    In the experience, there is a fellow friend, an ECKist, who was quite convinced all inner experiences had especially where it was phenomenal gave the person an authority on issues here. Several attempts to help were hijacked into caustic conversations. Even ESA suggestions. So I asked the Mahanta, my inner guide and Master for guidance on helping this dear Soul who Wah Z loves more than Soul loves Its defilements. The nudge I got was to give beingness. Let Soul be. In order to have freedom, I must give freedom. And so I did. Life I admit has been one of more adventuresome in spiritual things to which I am grateful.

    I am also grateful to all those who are in my life teaching me how to be, Co-work with the Mahanta and someday Co-work with God.

    Thanks once more.

  14. David says:

    The only way to be the best we can be, is to love without a reason just because that is the nature of life. As we learn to help ourselves love others, we learn to help other people too, including the furry ones.

  15. Elke Hughes says:

    I guess that the Law of Discrimination is learned by choosing our friends and letting go with impersonal love of those who try to hold us back.

  16. Moses Nduekhe says:

    Here lies the very important lesson.
    “Be unavailable to such people. Ignore their messages and invitations. Don’t give ear to their rumblings or complaints. Maybe they will get the hint. With those who linger, be firm but kind.”
    Thank you very much Wah Z. You are addressing me directly. They have indeed gotten the hint.

  17. Charlene says:

    It has taken me 60 years to transcend the karma of associating with significant others who do not wish me well. Mother, friends, family, two abusive husbands and their families, including stepchildren all acted with hatred and jealousy toward me and I subjugated myself to their emotions seeking approval and love from people who were hurtful to me. My religion taught me to turn the other cheek.
    Eckankar taught me I deserve to be loved. As a channel for the light and sound I not only deserve love but must keep my heart open to giving AND receiving love. Hateful people now remind me to HU more and I leave them in the dust of my departure.

  18. Irene Sng says:

    I am in the mist of nursing a hurt that was inflicted from 2 members of my group. A done deal is completed and though the shared monetary was agreed upon from the onset, I felt one member was unfairly treated. I raised my concern and was surprised by an unpleasant handling made from these member. My reasoning was brushed aside and no way my voice is being heard. I sang HU and asked Mahanta for guidance. Days passed and I gradually realised that I must not let this affect me & my work. I decided to keep away from those who hurt me although it is not completely possible as we are in the same working team for ongoing projects. I will sing HU whenever we meet – YES, the secret shared here is to work off the hurts in the inner from others and let go. May the blessings be.

  19. Rachel Saphir says:

    Yes, love is the only way, for ourselves and others. The more you bring love in the more you can release and the more you release the more you can bring love in. ❤️ Just take one step to get the ball rolling, the love flowing…

  20. Geetha Murthy says:

    It is such a beautiful lesson to learn! Thank you Mahanta for this excellent writing! I received the message I needed.

  21. Obianuju says:

    Thank you Wah Z for d quote. I am grateful. I will learn to let go and let God

  22. Heather Dixon says:

    I think a lot of it is about remembering to love ourselves, the Mahanta loves us why is it so hard to love ourselves? It’s easy to put that responsibility on the people around us and forget that it’s actually our job that’s why doing regular exercises is so important. When we do let go of the things and people harming us it gives us more time to love ourselves.

  23. Zacchaeus Akighir says:

    I never knew it was correct, or the right thing to do; but I walked away from friends that hurt me badly. Some “friends” that think they are playing smart by cheating, or by taking, and taking from you without any consideration of what their actions must ave impacted on you. Thank you Wah Z for this answer. It has shed light on what to do in many a situation.

  24. Moses Ezeala says:

    Life will teach you better when you let go and you let God.

  25. Moses Ezeala says:

    Singing HU the love song to God has help me and open my heart to let go and let God in. because when you let go you will find the glory of life.

  26. ellen says:

    Eckankar is one of the only spiritual paths I’ve encountered which acknowledges the wisdom of letting go of harmful associations and not getting embroiled in further interactions with people who are not spiritually good for you. I’m grateful for this posting because it reminds me that I do not have to feel guilty about doing what is healthy and often a matter of self-preservation for me. Thank you, Wah Z!

  27. Lovedales, Ghana says:

    Thank you Wah Z for the answer. I have learnt for sometime now (from the works of ECK) not to feel guilty about anything. I try my best to love and be nice to people. This has made me free in Soul and in my heart. I am very grateful.

  28. David says:

    It may sound very odd, but when the emotional wounds heal, one is often very grateful for those difficult times because they lift us spiritually and increase our capacity to love. A river resists changing its course but once the change happens, it no longer resists but flows onward as it always has.

  29. DocScientist says:

    I have had good number of people who have made me feel hurt in some form or the other. I have done my best to be kind and polite to those who hurt me. I practice forgiveness every day. Few months ago, there were few people whose words threw me out of my balance. I felt the excruciating pain in me that their words created. I found that because I was hurt by them, every time I met them I was unconsciously hurting them back too. Once I realised this, I asked Mahanta “what should I do about this?” The firm answer was “keep away from these people.” I felt it was morally wrong to keep away from people. It is as if I was avoiding them. But then it was the only way I can save myself from being hurt further and to save others from being hurt in return by me. So without reasoning Mahanta’s guidance, I simply decided to keep away. I kept away from those who hurt me as much as possible and some lingered around too. So I did my best to be polite with them and sang HU every time they struck a conversation with me. I am just so happy that my decision to keep away was right. It indeed gave me enough time to work off certain hurts from others that caused dark scars in my heart. The secret is to work off the hurts in the inner and not to go around hurting others back or arguing with them about their acts. Love you Z

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Copyright © 2018 ECKANKAR. All Rights Reserved. This copyright applies to this home page and all other pages of this website. The terms ECKANKAR, ECK, EK, MAHANTA, SOUL TRAVEL, and VAIRAGI, among others, are trademarks of ECKANKAR, PO Box 2000, Chanhassen, MN 55317-2000 USA.